Who Am I?

Who Am I?

This sounds like some mix of astrology, superstition, and an old wives’ tale . . . but apparently there’s actual data to back it up.

A new study out of England found that the MONTH when someone is born makes a big impact on their future career.

It’s hard to figure out the science behind it . . . there are theories about things like the amount of sunlight pregnant women are exposed to, or the allergies children are more prone to in different seasons.  But no one’s really sure.

All they know is that data has shown people born in certain months end up in certain careers more often.

I’m a little worried about what they say about the month I was born in. (November)

JANUARY.  Lots of doctors and debt collectors, fewer real estate agents.

FEBRUARY.  Lots of artists and traffic cops, fewer physicists.  Also, people born in February are most prone to narcolepsy.  (???)

MARCH.  Lots of pilots and musicians.

APRIL.  The only career that’s overrepresented in April over time is . . . dictators.  People born in April are also more likely to have lower-than-average IQs, and more health problems.

MAY.  Lots of politicians, fewer pro athletes.

JUNE.  Lots of CEOs.  Also high on Nobel Prize winners.

JULY.  Lots of manual laborers and artists.

AUGUST.  Lots of manual laborers and high-ranking politicians.

SEPTEMBER.  Lots of people in academia and sports.

OCTOBER.  Lots of politicians.  People in October are also most likely to live the longest.

NOVEMBER.  Lots of serial killers.  Also, people born in November are most prone to bipolar disorder.

DECEMBER.  Lots of dentists.  Also lots of religious and secular MESSIAHS . . . everyone from JESUS . . . to STALIN and MAO.


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